Daily Devotional – 11/25/14 “He who finds a wife … finds favor!”

Proverbs 18:22, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.” Now men, not only do you find a wife but you obtain favor from God. Do you not understand how big that is? When you find your wife, you also receive unmerited (that’s undeserved) favor from God and all you did was find the one person God made for you. Yea, I know you think you’re doing something because you’ve been shacking with her for 10 years but don’t you want your favor? I know you think if it ain’t broke why fix it but look again, it’s actually broken and needs fixing. Oh, you’re listening to the folk who say she’ll change once she gets the ring and the paper? Then she isn’t your wife because if you’re already living together then you’re already doing married folk things and you should be committed to each other.

    How do you find you wife?

  • 1. Release the demons of your past. You are not your absentee, alcoholic, drug addicted, or abusive father or mother (if that applies). You are not what society has deemed you to be. You can be exactly who God has destined you to be, if only you believe in yourself. Your past does not matter so stop allowing society to make you think it does. God made you in His image and Ephesians 4:31 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.”
  • 2. You have to be ready to be a husband. 1 Timothy 5:8 says, “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” The worst thing you can do is take on the responsibility of a husband without being ready.
  • 3. Look for her. But you must have your heart in God in order for Him to lead you to your wife because when you go looking through your natural eyes, the enemy will have lust looking like love and then you’ll be tied to someone who will cause you hell the rest of your natural life. And please don’t go get someone else wife, she isn’t yours! Proverbs 18:22.
  • 4. Cherish her, don’t hurt her. Colossians 3:19 says, “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.” No one has a right to put their hands on their spouse whether male or female. If you need help, get it!

This is for both men and women – STOP! Stop giving up every time things get hard. Stop allowing folk into your household, into your marriage and into your relationship. Stop telling all your business to your family and friends. You forgive, they don’t. Stop arguing and fighting! Learn how to hash out stuff like grown folk because when you don’t, you raise children who argue and fight. Above all things, keep God as the head. So many times in marriages we leave God out of it and then we expect Him to fix it when it’s bad but keep God as the head and allow Him to be the guide and He will be. It’s not going to be always easy; nothing is but hold on for he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord!

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Daily Devotional – 2/29/12 “Your wife, your watchman!”

Yesterday’s message was to the women, so today I couldn’t dare leave out the men. I can’t write this from a man’s point of view, because I am a woman, but I can write it from my point of view to men. Now, I know you’re wondering how a woman is supposed to be a watchman over her husband but I’ll explain in a minute. As I said on yesterday and as everyone knows, woman was created by God’s hands from a rib from man’s body and in creating woman and man, God did so in his image and in his likeness. Now, because woman was made from man using a part of him, he is supposed to love her with all of him because she is him. As a man, if you follow God, he’ll lead you to your wife (your rib) and when you take vows you become one flesh for the bible says in Genesis 2:24, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” See, when you stand before God proclaiming the love for your wife you are binding yourself together as one and this is a binding contract that the 2 of you sign before God so you are supposed to be in it until death. I know, you may say that a woman changes after marriage, she nags all the time or she doesn’t want to give love like she is supposed to, but just hold on and please stop with the thing that we (women) are supposed to be submissive to you because you’re the head of the house. We got it and it doesn’t have to be told to us every day!

Now, you are supposed to be the head and as the head, you are bound to certain things that you are supposed to do. Number 1, the bible says in Ephesians 5:28, “So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church.” See, when you, as a husband, disrespect your wife, you are in a sense, disrespecting yourself because she is a part of you. When you hit your wife, you are hurting yourself because she is a part of you. God made you the head of the house but he didn’t give you beating rights. God made you the provider but he didn’t make you a punisher. Stop treating your wife as your child just because you have the authority to be the head for Colossians 3:19 says, “Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly.” Yea, I know there will be times when her mouth keeps going and you wish she’d be quiet but it’s in a woman’s nature to have the last say, so just be quiet, leave the room and let her calm down (plus you being in her presence makes her madder). Number 2, you are the provider and it is your duty to do what you have to do, within God’s line to make sure your family eats because the bible says in 1 Timothy 5:8, “But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” Now, this doesn’t mean that woman shouldn’t also be a helpmate because men need help too although they won’t always say it. Yes, the helper needs to be helped sometime. Number 3, you have to carry yourself worthy of being followed. Titus 1:7 says, “Since an overseer is entrusted with God’s work, he must be blameless–not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain.” This scripture says overseer and was geared toward the overseer of church but I think it fits here because as a man you have been entrusted, by God, to oversee your house therefore God’s work so you must also be all those things mentioned above. It is your responsibility to be a role model for your son and an example of the type of man your daughter wants to marry. You, as the man, instill the core values and morals in your children. Yea, they may stray from it while they are going through their rebellious faze but if you start them out on a strong foundation, they’ll have something to rebuild on once everything else has been blown away.

As a man, you have a greater responsibility because your family is in your hands. When you choose to be a deadbeat dad or a lousy husband, it isn’t up to the woman to make you pay for that because God will judge you for it and you will be judged. Why? Because God has given you these things to take care of and if you choose not to, then you’re going against what he has destined for your life. Just because your baby momma is acting like a female dog, it doesn’t give you the right to walk away from your child. For the record, paying child support doesn’t take away those responsibilities because they still need a daddy. So, take her butt to court and get some visitation rights. So, stop hiding behind what she is doing or saying because she’ll have to stand before God on that. Finally, a woman is destined to be her husband’s watchman because who else, besides God, can have his back better than his woman? It’s like 2 police detectives who are partners. They have to have faith and trust in one another to know that when they go into a hostile situation, they are covered by the person standing behind them. It’s the same way in marriage. Your man is stronger, wiser, more determined and better at what he does when he knows he has someone just as strong, wise and determined standing behind him. (By the way ladies, standing behind your man doesn’t make you less than a woman so stop thinking you have to always stand beside him because standing behind him shields and protects you). You are his watchman because Proverbs 31:11-12 says, “Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” Men, be the man God has destined you to be. Just because you’ve fallen and made some mistakes, so what, get up and dust yourself and start being who you are supposed to be. Provide for you home, love and respect your wife and raise your children! God has made you the head, so your family needs and depends on you.